Money may not buy us happiness, but that does not mean it grows on trees either. Nearly everything in life depends on how we opt to allocate our resources – which groceries to buy, where to go to college, how to afford a house, et cetera. Colored bills and copper coins must be doled out wisely or invested in things possessing a high rate of return. Budgets ought to be tight and clean-cut. Failure to do so will merely put us in a financial ditch with no visible way out – and, worse, in a spiral of depression.
In times such as these when oil prices cannot rise any higher than the Tower of Babel could, we common folks are in a dire situation. Obviously, we need to save, save and SAVE. And what better way to start saving than by making the most out of the various thingamabobs we see piled inside our houses? Sure, Mr. Piggy can put on a few pounds, but making efficient use out of our everyday clutter not only saves moolah and space; it also makes for a cleaner and more eye-friendly environment.
These practical things are stuff most of us own already. The Menagerie presents a well-trimmed list of everyday objects and the new ways they could be put to use. All you need is a little twist of the imagination to make these ideas work.
1. Hairdryers = Electronic Feather Dusters + Photo Detacher
Whoever thought hairdryers were merely to be used for blow-drying wet and tangled hair? Introducing the Omega 170 Hairdryer – the perfect gadget which could banish dust from tough-to-reach nooks and crannies! Simply set your hairdryer to ‘cool’ and blow away! Only bear in mind that when blow-dusting tall furniture (such as bookshelves), it is much preferred to enlist gravity’s help by working from top to bottom.
Or you can opt to use the dryer’s heating talents to extract those tricky post-flood photos from soaked photo collections. When trying to detach a particularly delicate photograph from its sticky placeholder that is the album, set your hairdryer to ‘warm’ and direct it at the back of the paper while gently tugging the photo free.
2. Tennis balls = Furniture Balancer + Floor Protector
Tennis balls are great for… guess what?
Tennis, of course! That is, until they lose their bounciness and start seeming more like a dog’s chew toy than anything else. But these little spheres can kill two birds with one stone (figuratively). Ever had a wobbly chair on a newly-waxed floor? Don’t let the limp legs scratch that fine floor. Simply carve an X into the ball and wedge it under the faulty leg of said chair. Rest assured, not only will you be able to sit comfortably, but your floor will also be score-free.
3. Coffee Filters = Disposable Bowls + Glass Wiper + Camera Flash Filter
These lovely fluted cupcake-shaped filters are useful not only when sieving coffee, but also during movie marathons. Where to put your chips and dip? Voila: use the coffee filter to serve your snacks. Not only does it make for a pretty bowl; it also saves water otherwise needed for dishwashing.
When out of rags or paper towels, these absorbent coffee filters are your best bet for window cleaning because they leave neither marks nor coffee stains behind. The brightness brought about by a camera flash can also be softened by placing a filter over the flash.
4. Coffee grounds = Natural Fertilizer + Insect Repllent
But before coffee filters, there was coffee. Ahh… coffee.
The wonders and miracles of this godly beverage have never ceased to be of help to the nocturnal student. Aside from helping us prop our eyes open during lengthy study sessions night after night, who would ever think that a handful of coffee grounds actually serves well as… fertilizer? Maybe COS people.
For the information of we who are not as enlightened, coffee is actually rich in potassium, nitrogen, and in other minerals. Spreading a layer of coffee grounds over topsoil would enable the plants to absorb these minerals encapsulated within those tiny grains.
Acidic soil also keeps pests, such as mosquitoes and slugs, at bay, because coffee emits a strong odor which most bugs dislike. But we don’t suggest tucking coffee grounds under your pillow.
5. Shampoo = Cockroach “Spray”
Cockroaches are unwelcome guests in every house, gleefully bugging (pun intended) the residents with their sudden presence and occassional aerial acrobatics. A few ridiculous attempts to exterminate this immortal menace with a slipper, broom, or heavy encyclopedia would eventually leave it in a very awkward situation: struggling and twitching while lying on its back, uncleansed and spilling its entrails on your slipper, broom, or Volume X Encyclopedia Brittanica back cover. But this is not the time to Philistinely smite the cockroach.
This is the perfect time to grab shampoo from the nearest bathroom.
Mix some of it with water (ratios don’t matter) in a spray bottle, and squirt it on the target. Apparently, the chemicals affect the cockroach (and many other biological organisms like you and me) the same way salt affects worms and slugs. Do not forget to wipe the slippery mixture off the floor/walls and bury/flush the cockroach to prevent its remnants from enticing fellow comrades.
And you thought that shampoo was only used to make your hair as straight as Yuko Yamashita’s.
6. Duct Tape = Cellular Phone Case
Duct tape has been basking in accolades since the dawn of the 20th century. The “silver stuff that can do just about anything” was originally used to refurbish metal air ducts, hence the name. But in settings where air ducts are uncommon, the duct tape still manages to get Muggles like us out of sticky situations.
If you recently bought an expensive, luxurious phone but spent just enough not to be able to afford a matching expensive, luxurious phone case, just whack on some duct tape! Not only does it provide a waterproof case that is MUCH cheaper than a legit one; you also no longer have to worry about mixing your phone with someone else’s.
7. Butter = De-stickinator
Yes, butter does go with bread, but it also goes with just about anything sticky. Made some messy work involving glue? Slather some butter all over your hands before washing it all away with soap and water. Gum on your shoe? Rub the soles with butter and the gum will glide away smoothly. Serving a jam tart for dessert? Smear a layer of butter on your knife and slice away! (Well, maybe just for the richer flavor.)
Only remember to give thanks to the many natural oils found in any slab of butter for making your life sticky-free. Also special thanks to the magic of differing densities.
8. Neckties = Straps + Pillows + Table Runners + Ingenious Apparel
Since their noble advent, these lengthy pieces of fabric have given its wearers a distinct sense of individuality, and on top of it all, style. But according to the laws of nature, said ties eventually get worn out from the relentless percolation of the sands of time, draining their colorful vividness and panache until they become destined to be thrown into the bottom drawer.
Fortunately, neckties are so versatile that they have to be repurposed into a melange of reincarnations such as a stylish guitar strap or a bag. Maybe even a guitar bag, if you sewed them all up together.
If you are gradually becoming extra creative from reading this article, neckties can also be sewn into belts, throw pillows, table runners, prom dresses, and other stuff that you would find in an expensive haberdashery. Save ties, save silk, save lives.
