On my way to covering an event, I overheard a report on the radio that said overthinking can shorten one’s life. This struck me as I was just thinking about all the things I had to do for the day and the days to come. In my youth, I was often disappointed in myself when plans didn’t go my way. My swimming varsity coach back in Grade 4 already noticed that I would heavily pressure myself to excel. Even in high school, when I fell short of achieving my goals, it would not be something I would take lightly.
We make decisions every day; we fill out our schedules from day to night. “Plan ahead,” they say. This piece of advice has often been given to me ever since I was a kid. Whether it be at home or in school, we are always told to plan ahead to be able to reach our goals and be successful. There is this idea that having a plan means having one’s life together, with a future already set in stone. We can plot out our days, months, and years to the dot, but we can never account for the unexpected things that get in the way.
People may argue that whatever happens in your life is in your control. Some might say that if only things were planned out better then unfortunate things could not have happened. Despite being true to an extent, there are things that happen outside our control. The weather is unpredictable; we have no control of when it’s going to rain or when it will be a sunny day. Just like the weather, we cannot predict all that will happen in life. Life is unexpected. Life can get in the way of the detailed plans we have arranged for ourselves. It’s safe to say that life just happens.
Going into my first year in college, I felt like I was so sure with what I wanted to do, and how I wanted my college career to pan out. However, things did not go as planned. Although I was performing well overall, I struggled to pull up my grades for one class in particular. I would consult with my classmates and schedule my days to study ahead of time. Despite my efforts, it just didn’t measure up. I failed to achieve one of my goals of being a Dean’s Lister in my first term. But on my second term, I picked myself back up and finally achieved my goal.
But to my great dismay, by the end of frosh year I felt like I had been beaten down back to square one because, once again, I failed to meet the requirements to become a Dean’s Lister. I blamed myself for letting history repeat itself, thinking I should have known better and been well adjusted to university life. Instead of feeling relieved to close the year, I was filled with doubts and insecurities beyond my academic performance. This was just a few of the many twists and turns that life has brought me to make a change of plans.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the wheel of overthinking; thoughts of what-could-have-beens or what-ought-to-bes consuming us because of the plans we had already set for ourselves. We often map out our life in order to prevent the past from repeating, or to avoid the uncertainties of the future. In effect, we already build certain expectations for ourselves. Life will always surprise us—sometimes these surprises are unwanted. It’s a matter of being able to adapt to what life has laid out for us and turn it around to something better than we have planned.
Now on my third year in college, I have learned to not let the unexpected challenges of life set me back. I realized that every curveball that was thrown at me helped develop and strengthen my character. Being so caught up in the scheme of things, it was difficult for me to stay hopeful and move forward in times of disaster. Having to adjust and change my plans amid the mishaps still takes a lot of humility and courage for me to get back up and try again. At the end of it all, I am grateful and I see that I have gained much more than what I thought I had lost.
As we move toward the last half of the term and to the final months of the year, we can look back at what has transpired with either disappointment or gratitude. Setting ourselves up for success will not always be a guarantee. However, the resilience you build from responding and adapting to the unexpected realities of life will take you farther than any plan.
