Not okay

Recently, my friends and I have been night biking twice a week as an attempt to be fit. One night, we rode around an area that we don’t visit often. The trip there was similar to our previous ones, except for one thing. Even though we didn’t pass by a lot of people, we still encountered several catcallers. They were everywhere: in our neighborhood, in busy streets, and even inside convenience stores.

I never really imagined that our bike ride would include being catcalled. The problem, it seems, was worse than I thought. I was particularly bothered by our experience in the convenience store, probably because we were able to pedal away from the other catcallers we encountered outside.

Upon parking our bikes, I could already feel the men loitering by one of the buildings staring at us, a group of girls. Entering the store wasn’t of much comfort either. After being informed that they ran out of lids, we were forced to finish our drinks inside, which is, I suppose, a fairly common thing to do inside a 7-Eleven.

However, the male cashier began observing us, even striking up a conversation with one of my friends. Apparently, my other friend also noticed that we were being observed, so we stood at a distance. Wanting to leave already, I wore my helmet and walked to the door. Then the cashier said, “Baby, bawal helmet dito. Pwede pakitanggal? Salamat, baby.” I removed the helmet and apologized while trying to smile, even though I was distraught. I felt very unsafe and ill at ease, and so did my friends. We swore that we wouldn’t go to that convenience store again.

A quick Google search would give a definition of catcalling as to “make a whistle, shout, or comment of a sexual nature to a woman passing by.” However, a prevalent form of catcalling is not necessarily sexual; it may be in the form of a “Hi, Miss!” or “Smile ka naman, diyan!” In my case, calling a stranger “baby” when she is obviously not a child is very disturbing and inappropriate. An infographic by Mica Cruz that has been spreading across social media mentions that these statements make a woman feel nervous, scared, and that they are not safe, which is considered as harassment.

It saddens me that our society has come to this, with a need for an infographic to inform that making other people feel uncomfortable (to the point of being harassed), is not okay. This is probably because people would still find a way to justify these acts, believing that it is harmless because no one gets harmed physically. But there are some instances that catcalls do escalate to physical harm, so isn’t condemning the least of these acts a start in preventing worse scenarios?

Some may think that this shouldn’t be a big issue; some even consider a catcall as being a “compliment”. An article I’ve read online explores why street harassment is so alarming for a woman — it portrays a man’s dominance and sexual interest in her. In our patriarchal society, some would describe this as “boys will be boys”; women are always thought of bringing attention to themselves and that they are responsible for whatever this attention — even though unwanted — would bring onto them, with society usually emphasizing their clothes of choice.

This is why catcalling should be stopped. Not only does it promote victim-blaming, it also promotes indifference to violence. All humans deserve to feel safe and secure while living their lives (and wearing what they want). Catcalling deprives women of this right and further supports the archaic belief that women are just objects of the male attention. Women do not exist in this world as objects to boost the male ego, but as humans. They do not exist to be appraised and commented upon as they walk down the street. No one deserves to be pushed around and objectified because they live and breathe (or wear clothes that they are comfortable with) in public spaces.

Even with this still happening, don’t lose faith in humanity just yet. This may be a bit idealistic, but I believe that there is still hope for our society if we all just work together; by treating everyone with dignity and respect, regardless of what they are — it would result to a situation that is definitely better than our  status quo.